


Table Wars

by ErbiumKey



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cedric Diggory Lives, F/F, Hogwarts Fifth Year, No Horcruxes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:53:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29566395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ErbiumKey/pseuds/ErbiumKey
Summary: The Gryffindor/Slytherin rivalry is hurting Hermione's romance prospects. Especially Ron, and his hatred of 'slimy snakes'. So she does something about it.Things get a little out of hand, and Hogwarts is changed forever.No bashing, no Horcruxes, and Ron will come around eventually.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Daphne Greengrass
Comments: 2
Kudos: 45





	1. How to end centuries of strife, and look good doing it.

**Author's Note:**

> This will be a few chapters, I have most of a second chapter written from Daphne's viewpoint.
> 
> Basically, Voldemort killed Harry's parents, and that was the end of him.
> 
> The Philosopher's stone came to Hogwarts, but no possessed teacher to chase after it. No diary dropped in with Ginny's things. Sirius still escapes, but they catch Pettigrew. So he's exonerated and saves Harry from the Dursleys. Harry isn't entered in the Triwizard Tournament. No Umbridge, Remus is still teaching DADA, maybe he was the whole time who knows.
> 
> Also, in my head, the tables have always been Slytherin/Ravenclaw/Gryffindor/Hufflepuff, but it's really Gryffindor/Hufflepuff/Ravenclaw/Slytherin. I looked it up when I wrote this. I was disappointed.

The Table War, like many wars, began with the unintentional actions of one person.

It began with a study group and a simple invitation.

It ended with the destruction of centuries of house rivalries, and Hermione Granger’s first (and last) girlfriend.

Neville may have finally found the courage to ask out Hannah in the crossfire, but she was too busy flirting with Daphne to notice.

* * *

Young Hermione Granger had formed a small study group in her third year. Somehow they managed to have members from every house. The most surprising, yet her favourite, addition to her group was Tracy Davis and Daphne Greengrass.

Their little group consisted of 7 people, all various degrees of outcasts from their own houses.

Hannah Abbot and Susan Bones didn’t like most of the other Hufflepuffs in their year and usually found themselves pairing together to avoid them.

Neville Longbottom and Hermione Granger were both obvious Gryffindors, prone to rush in headfirst. Yet they found themselves in the minority of rather studious Gryffindors. The common room was far too chaotic for studying most weeks.

Padma Patil was a proud Ravenclaw, yet her continued contact with her rather flighty Gryffindor sister made many of her fellow housemates wary.

Tracy Davis and Daphne Greengrass found themselves the only Slytherins in their year who weren’t believers in the pureblood doctrine. Pureblood supremacy was not as common in Slytherin as many believed, and most of the other years were split fairly evenly among the camps. Yet they had the _‘fortune’_ to end up surrounded by the hellspawn of death eaters.

So their little group met 3 evenings a week, and it was their respite from their problems in their own houses. There was no talk of politics or gossip. Just studying and talk about the day-to-day of their lives. A little island of inter-house unity in a sea of bitter rivalries and hatred.

Padma, Tracy, Daphne, and Hermione all shared Arithmancy. The small nature of the class meant that their study group was half the class. The four of them often worked together on group projects and traded ideas freely in class, and in their study group. Outside of group and class, they had little interaction. A small nod in the halls, a friendly wave while wandering Hogsmeade.

They were Hermione’s closest friends outside of Harry, and occasionally Ron.

Some days she wanted to kidnap Daphne from the Slytherin table at a meal and vent about her annoying redheaded friend.

Daphne was an enigma for Hermione. She knew she found the girl attractive, her ‘thing’ for pretty blondes was well established after the Tournament. Her confusing feelings about the Veela turned into anger almost immediately. She hated not understanding something, especially about herself.

When Padma mentioned how tired she was of Sue Li fawning over Fleur, it began to click for Hermione. She had her first crush. When Viktor asked her to the Yule Ball, was what cemented it for her. Here was this older, attractive, and famous Quidditch Player, and all she could think was, _’not the right champion’_. Yet Viktor was nice, and when she told him she wasn’t attracted to boys. He took it with dignity and asked if they could go as friends.

He just wanted an evening without some fangirl throwing herself at him.

She told her parents that summer and spent a good bit of her free time researching this new facet of herself. She was scared at first, but it all went surprisingly well. Her parents were proud of her for being true to herself, and she found it was rather well accepted in magical society.

Despite how backward magicals were at times, as far back as the founding of Hogwarts, women in power were easily accepted. They could be head of houses, wizards would take the names of more influential witches, and same-sex bonding had been legal as far back as 1820. Muggles were still executing homosexuals at that point.

This was mostly due to access to potions that allowed two women to produce their own genetic offspring and blood adoptions. Things like that meant it wouldn’t end your family if your heir fell in love with someone of the same gender. In her research, she learned that Susan Bones’s aunt Amelia had bonded with a woman who subsequently died alongside her brother and his wife.

So she went back to Hogwarts for her 5th year with new eyes and decided pretty quickly she had a ‘type’. It started with the Head Girl during their first prefect meeting. Ron thought she was sick. She was too busy staring at Alice Fawley to notice his concern.

Within a month, Luna Lovegood, Daphne, and a few others had caught her eye more than once.

She blamed Fleur.

The prettiest of blondes made her realize she was a lesbian. Now she couldn’t keep her eyes off all the other pretty blondes.

Daphne though was her favourite. They had been friends for a couple of years now, and she loved her dry wit. The other girl always seemed so together, it took most of a year to get over how frumpy she made Hermione feel when they first started getting to know each other.

She had spent some time over the summer with her mother, a little bit of a personal makeover. A few letters with Padma about personal care routines among witches were helpful too. When she walked into Hogwarts for her fifth year, she had a whole new level of confidence.

When she caught a moment of Daphne blushing in her direction, all that hard work was worth it.

So she decided to take a chance.

First, she needed a plan. She wanted to kiss her (hopefully/maybe/possibly/in her dreams) girlfriend in public. Secrets didn’t last long in the castle, and it would only blow up in her face if she tried.

So she needed Daphne to be palatable to her fellow Gryffindors. At the same time, she needed Daphne to feel safe being seen in public with her.

* * *

A week after she decided she might have a chance with Daphne, she put her plans into motion.

On a quiet Monday evening, she cut her studying short in the library and headed to the great hall. She was one of the first people to arrive. She usually sat near the centre of the table with Harry, Ron, Neville, and some combination of other Weasleys and their friends. Today, she sat facing the entrance, at the end of the table closest to the door.

She watched the doors like a hawk, as the flow of students slowly picked up. Just before dinner was to be served, she saw her prey.

Before Daphne and Tracy could get too far, she chased after them.

“Daphne, could I borrow you for a moment?”

The blonde looked utterly lost for a moment and gave a panicked glance to the Slytherin table. Hermione easily recognized their interested looks.

She capitalized on the girl’s confusion and took her arm in hers. She quickly pulled her over to the Gryffindor table and sat her down. Tracy followed along and sat beside the shell-shocked heiress. Hermione knew Tracy well enough to tell the girl was fighting a case of the giggles.

Hermione took a seat across from the pair of Slytherins and began to talk. “I was doing some research on the Wizengamot, and I kept coming across all these references to things I didn’t quite understand. I think it has to do with some societal things I never learned as a muggleborn. Could you answer a few questions?”

Her question seemed to snap Daphne out of her stupor, just as she opened her mouth to respond, a shout rang out from the entrance.

“What the bloody hell is this?!” Came from an irate Ron, with a rather bewildered Harry following behind.

Hermione knew it was coming, she even guessed almost the exact words out of his mouth. “These are my friends Daphne, and Tracy, you know… our classmates. We study together, I had a few questions.”

Ron gaped at her, and Harry gave her a little bit of an embarrassed look.

Before Ron could formulate a response, she continued. “Would you like me to introduce them?”

By now, Neville had noticed the commotion, and decided to take a seat next to Hermione, “Hey Daph, Trace, welcome to our neck of the woods.”

Tracey gave him a bright smile, “Hey Nev, Hermione kind of kidnapped Daph, it looked like fun so I tagged along.”

While Ron watched on with horror, over the next minute or so, the entire study group decided to join in on the action. They even picked up a few extras in the form of Lavender, Parvati, and Luna, who had all followed Padma over.

“Come have a seat Harry, I’ll introduce everyone. We meet a few days a week for studying. Sometimes it’s nice to get away from Gryffindors for a little while.” Hermione said and motioned to the spot next to her.

Harry taking a seat was the final straw, “I’m not eating with some slimy snake! They aren’t even allowed here!” Ron yelled.

“You’ll find that, nowhere in the Hogwarts rules does it forbid students from eating at other house’s tables,” Hermione said, without looking at him.

“Well real Gryffindors won’t be able to eat with them at the table, so shoo.” He said, waving his hand dismissively. A few Gryffindors nearby nodded at the dismissal.

“Well then, you’re welcome to go eat with the Hufflepuffs or the Ravenclaws. No rule says they can’t eat here.” She pointed towards the head table, where most of the staff were watching curiously. “You’ll notice the teachers aren’t stopping them.”

Professor McGonagall decided to defend her, (not so secret) favourite cub. “Two points each for inter-house unity for Misses Bones, Abbot, Greengrass, Davis, Lovegood, both Patils, Brown, and Misters Longbottom, and Potter. Ten points to Miss Granger for sticking up for her friends.”

Ron looked at his head of house like she had grown a second head.

Behind the head table, Hufflepuff, Slytherin, and Ravenclaw all gained four points, and Gryffindor gained sixteen.

Hermione smiled beatifically at Ron.

“Well, I won’t stand for it, I’m eating with the Hufflepuffs then. Who’s with me?” He asked.

Dean, Seamus, and a handful of other Gryffindors stood and joined Ron. Total, eleven outraged Gryffindors marched over to the Hufflepuff table.

The head boy, Cedric Diggory, spoke up as they were on their way, “Well maybe us Hufflepuffs don’t want to eat with YOU. Who’s with ME?” He asked his fellow Hufflepuffs. A full half of Hufflepuff stood, and Cedric marched them over to the Slytherin table.

The disgusted faces of almost half of Slytherin watched as a pack of Hufflepuffs marched to their table. Most of them stood, and rushed for Ravenclaw, all while muttering curses about duffers and mudbloods.

In response to those mutterings, Angelina Johnson stood and shouted, “Well maybe us Mudbloods should see what it’s like from the other side.”

The entire hall stood stock still, as Angelina and the rest of the Gryffindor quidditch team (minus Harry), and a bunch of muggleborns all stood, and walked over to the Slytherin table.

By the time they sat, the entire hall was chaos, and people were running from table to table as lines were drawn.

The Slytherin table had two groups, muggleborns, Hufflepuffs, and moderate Slytherins all mingled together taking up two-thirds of the table. Then a small group of proud Slytherins, who refused to leave their table. They were led by Draco Malfoy, and seemed to be scrunched together to be as far as possible from their _’tablemates’_.

The Ravenclaw table was split between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. Each house clumped together on their end, and not interacting.

Hufflepuff had become the table of let's hate Slytherins. By now there were Slytherins at every table except Hufflepuff, so members from the other three houses had congregated in their shared hatred of the missing house.

Gryffindor became a rather eclectic mix. Lots of small groups, a decent chunk of Ravenclaw had migrated their way. Siblings split up by house divides joined them. Many were studying or talking about class like nothing had happened.

Throughout the chaos, Hermione Granger bore the biggest smile of her entire life. This went way beyond anything she expected but was perfect for her goals. She spent the rest of the meal in quiet conversation with her study group, and their last-minute additions. Daphne never quite recovered and was quiet the whole meal. Occasionally she sent a small smile Hermione’s way.

It only improved her mood.

* * *

As dinner winded down, a new plan began to form in her head. Maybe it was time to do away with the house rivalries once and for all. Ideas percolated the entire way back to the Gryffindor common room. The moment she walked in, the twins ran right to her, grabbed her by the arms, and carried her back out of the common room.

“What the!”

“Stop!”

“Get off me!”

“Help!”

“You’re attacking a prefect!”

“Two weeks detention!”

By the time they pulled her into some hidden passageway, and dropped her on the ground she was hoarse from yelling at them.

They took a few careful steps back, keeping a wary eye on her.

“Sorry.” One said when they finished backing away.

“We were going to kiss you for that stunt.” The other continued.

“But, we saw the, ‘I’m making plans face’.”

“We know that face well.”

“We love that face.”

“So we wanted to get you alone.”

“Whatever it is we want in.”

“What you just did might be the greatest moment in Hogwarts history.”

“And you’re not done yet are you?”

She carefully stood, dusted herself off, and glared at them. She weighed the pros and cons and decided it was worth the risk.

She took a deep breath, it was time to make a deal with the devil(s).

“You ask no questions, and for the rest of your time at Hogwarts, you won’t twin speak me, and immunity from any pranks that don’t affect the entire school.” She said, giving them her best glare.

The two twins faced each other, and after a few looks and small gestures, seemed to reach an accord.

“Deal, but you tell us why you’re doing this.” The one on the left said.

“It started for a personal reason, but I saw a chance to end all this ridiculous house rivalry crap. So I’m taking it.” She said, carefully.

The same twin who spoke up before replied, “The great table war all began for a girl. The lovely miss Greengrass is very lucky.”

She felt her face catch ch on fire and gaped at him.

“See Fred, I told you she had a thing for blondes.” He continued, and elbowed his brother. ‘Fred’ reluctantly reached in his pocket, and pulled out a galleon, and handed it to ‘George’.

“Damn, I still thought it might be Neville. Good eye brother.” Fred replied.

Her embarrassment was slowly turning into fury. The twins quickly raised their hands placatingly.

“Sorry, Sorry, we take bets on the rumour mill all the time. Even the teachers were expecting you and Harry. After this summer, we were pretty sure that ship sailed. Something about how you responded to Fleur last year made me curious. Fred usually has a better eye for romance, so I kept it a secret. I wanted to win for once.”

Hermione took a deep breath and decided she still had the advantage. “New rule, Fred for losing dyes his hair for the next month. ONLY Fred. I want people to be able to tell you apart.”

A little more silent haggling, slightly more angrily, between the twins, and ‘George’ faced her.

“Can we pick the colour?” He asked.

“Yes, but it can’t be even close to red. My vote is green, but you can decide yourselves.”

Another quick conference and George replied, “No green is perfect. It plays into the whole house rivalries thing.”

Fred burst out laughing, “Oh! I had an amazing idea. What if we took different sides, we’d have to pretend to be fighting, but it’d be amazing.”

George gave him one look and cracked up.

At this point, even Hermione was enjoying their antics.

“Okay fearless leader, you have our support, what's next?” Their spokesman asked.

“Do you know any artists? I think I know how to go from here.”

“Lee will help, he can keep a secret. Can we bring him in?” He offered.

“Sure, can you go get him now? Also, tell Harry I need the map and his cloak, it’s important.”

From there it was a long night, but hopefully worth it.

Professor McGonagall was surprisingly cooperative.

* * *

When they arrived in the Great Hall, all affectations of individual houses were gone. Hanging over all the tables, were two identical banners. One at each end.

Over the formerly Slytherin table, flew a white banner. It bore a complicated filigree, made up of all four house colours. At the centre stood four individuals holding hands. One for each house. On the left was the Gryffindor, she was the shortest of the four, with long hair down her back. The Hufflepuff was the tallest, big and burly. Ravenclaw’s was a girl as well, with shoulder-length hair, and a little taller than the other girl. Finishing on the right with a slim Slytherin boy, who was barely taller than his Gryffindor compatriot.

They had told Lee to make each of them distinct, but nothing insulting. The Slytherin reminded her of Malfoy. The ponce seemed to notice the resemblance as well. There were shouts of “My father will hear about this!” ringing in the hall when he arrived. All the figures would occasionally let go of their hands, and gave a friendly wave to anyone looking their way.

When one of them waved at Malfoy, he’d had enough, he lit the banner on fire with a scream of _’Incendio’_ and chaos erupted. He was tackled to the ground by Cedric Diggory, who was seated nearby, at the formerly Slytherin table eating peacefully.

A yell of “One hundred points from Slytherin for endangering fellow students!” from Professor McGonagall.

This was followed by a surprising, “Detention with me for the of the semester!” from Professor Snape.

The entire hall was shocked silent by him punishing a Slytherin, and watched in awe as he dragged the blond from the hall.

At the same time, the banner disappeared and re-appeared, good as new, and without a sound. Hermione grinned.

The elves were going above and beyond. She didn’t even think someone would try to destroy one of the banners.

The other banners weren’t quite as complex, the Slytherin one was the important one. They were the most likely to try to retake their table. So they wanted to make it unpalatable to its more conservative members. They all had the same filigree around the edges, but in black, over a white background. Then each bore a unique avatar they hoped represented the table.

Above the old Ravenclaw table was a single student in an unmarked Hogwarts uniform. He would occasionally look down at the table below him, and make a shushing gesture.

For the Hufflepuff table, there was another student in an unmarked uniform. She was constantly glaring at the other tables, and would sometimes shake an angry fist at them.

Finally for Hermione’s table of choice, was two students, a boy, and a girl. Both in the unmarked uniform, sitting across a small table and talking animatedly.

Hermione watched with interest as students walked in, noticed the banners, and picked a table.

Each table ended up a fairly decent mix of students of every house. They had coined them the tables of Unity (Slytherin), Silence (Ravenclaw), Strife (Hufflepuff), and Friendship (Gryffindor) while they were making the banners.

They had worked surprisingly well. As more students entered, the Unity table was slowly turning into a raucous party. The Silence table was glaring in their direction while they ate in silence, most of them were studying or writing letters. At the centre of Strife sat Ron, and they looked at the other tables with suspicion. Even some Slytherins, mostly those who had remained at their table yesterday, had joined them, and no one complained. At Friendship, Hermione’s study group had moved to the middle, and the table was filled with small groups of students, usually comprising at least two houses.

Outside of Malfoy’s outburst, the only real surprise was when the twins arrived. One turned right to Unity and headed in that direction. The other headed towards Strife. They stopped when they noticed they had gone opposite directions, and turned and scowled at each other.

“Where are YOU going!?”

“You like it like this?” He waved at the tables.

The one closest to Unity, pointed at the table, “Look at that, it's like we just won a quidditch match. How could you not want in on that?”

The other looked at the table with exaggerated disdain. Malfoy would have been proud. “Well, maybe I liked the way it was before!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

When the twin headed towards Unity turned his back on his brother, the other cast a quick _’colovaria’_ and the entire school watch in shock as Fred walked to the Unity table with green hair. He didn’t seem to even notice the change until one of his new tablemates pointed it out.

* * *

Sometime between Malfoy’s outburst and the twins’ _’fight’_ , Daphne and Tracey sat across from her.

It was still fairly early, so they were mostly isolated at the center of the table. “Good work, who drew the banners?” Tracey asked.

Hermione decided it wasn’t worth hiding from her friends, “Lee Jordan, the twins kidnapped me from the common room last night and begged to help.”

“Rather ingenious, singling out the Slytherin table like that,” Daphne said with a smile.

“I figured they were the most likely to try to retake their table, so they were important.” She returned.

“Why aren’t the teachers doing anything?” Tracey asked with a suspicious look, “Also, where's Snape?”

“Malfoy tried to light the Slytherin banner on fire, cost Slytherin one hundred points, and Professor Snape dragged him out by the ear. It was amazing.”

Daphne and Tracey both cracked a smile at that.

“Some of the teachers are in on it, I knew we’d need at least tacit approval. So I went to Professor McGonagall. I’m not sure who else knows, but I used her permission to convince the elves to help. They were more than excited to help. They’ve gone above and beyond, when he lit a banner on fire, it was replaced in a few seconds with a brand new one.”

“Merlin, he's going to get crucified by the rest of the house.” The half-blood said with barely contained laughter.

“The twins will be pissed when they find out they missed the best part of their prank. They’re going to have a big row when they get here. They wanted to wait until the hall was almost full.” The brunette replied.

“Why?” Tracey asked.

“They upset me after my kidnapping, I decided to punish them by telling them they had to be distinctly different for a month or I wouldn’t let them in on it.”

Daphne interjected with, “How different?”

“Fred’s hair is going to be green, it kind of spiralled out of control, and now they are joking about being spies. They are going to have a huge fight, George is going to cozy up to Ron and team angry children. Fred is going to go hang with Diggory at the party table.” The brunette said with a shrug.

Tracey seemed to get an idea in her head and glanced between Daphne and Hermione. The brunette almost cursed.

“So how’d this all start?” She asked, Hermione could hear the laughter in her voice, and Daphne looked at her friend with increasing suspicion.

“I just wanted to sit with all of my friends, I knew Ron would make a scene. I figured the more public I made it the better. I thought he’d go sulk at the other end of the table. He was even more of a child than I thought he was. Diggory took it to a whole new level. As the dust settled, I got the idea that: ‘Maybe I could do something about these stupid house rivalries?’.”

“Friends, huh?” Tracey asked, with a pointed look at Daphne.

For just a moment, the blonde blushed and then focused on her breakfast.

Hermione’s day just kept getting better. She simply shrugged and gave the other girl her best smile.

“So now that all the houses are buddy-buddy, can you introduce me to Potter? Ever since third year when he started filling out, I’ve been having dreams of him in his quidditch leathers.”

The brunette choked on some scrambled egg, and glared at the Slytherin, “You might have to fight Ginny Weasley for him. They’ve been circling each other all summer. She finally got over the whole boy-who-lived thing. Harry’s been completely lost, and Sirius keeps giving him these absurd suggestions. The highlight of my summer.”

“Damn, not picking a fight with a Weasley. They fight dirty, and never alone.”

She wanted to disagree, but really couldn’t. They could fight each other all day, but when acted upon by an outside force, they tended to circle the wagons pretty quickly.

“Lee mentioned he was single last night, he’s only a year older. I have a feeling you two would get along.”

“He is nice to look at…” she said, looking for him across the room. She found him with some of the Gryffindor quidditch team at the Unity table. She elbowed Daphne and stood up. “Wish me luck?”

Daphne looked at her friend, “I feel a little sorry for him, Zabini is still recovering from last year.”

“Zabini was laughing with Draco while he called my mum a mudblood. He deserved it.” She huffed and headed off.

“Happy hunting,” Hermione said to Tracey as she walked away.

The blonde watched Tracey for a bit, and turned to her friend, “So you have me all to yourself, what’s next?”

Hermione figured it’d all gone well so far, might as well let it ride.

“Well, this all started as a way to get you to say yes if I asked you to Hogsmeade.” She shrugged.

The blonde’s befuddled look was worth the effort.

“All this for little old me?” She said once she finally collected herself.

“Honestly, I just wanted to get Ron’s tantrum out of the way, and maybe get you to be willing to be seen in public with me. This whole thing has kind of taken a mind of its own. We’ve got a few plans to make it stick, but ending centuries of house rivalries would be a fringe benefit at best.”

Just as Daphne opened her mouth to reply, a half-asleep Harry plopped down next to her.

“Mornin’ ‘Moine,” he said with a yawn.

Their little group quickly populated, and just as Neville took a seat on the other side of Harry, the twins started yelling at the entrance to the hall.

Throughout the whole thing, Hermione and Daphne were eyeing each other. When the blonde mouthed a simple, yes, Hermione broke into a huge smile.

Nevile looked between them, “You finally asked her out? Took you long enough Hermione.”

Harry’s head shot up, “WHAT?”

Suddenly he was a bit more awake.

Daphne looked around at the audience Harry’s outburst provided. “Yes, Hermione, I’ll go with you to Hogsmeade this weekend.” She said with a smile.


	2. Pink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their date and the first real resistance to the new status quo arises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm guessing there's going to be two more chapters of this, but I could be wrong.

The Greengrass family is a fixture in wizarding politics. For centuries a Greengrass has served as Chief Warlock at least once a generation. If her mother’s griping about Dumbledore’s death grip on the position is any indication, she _really_ doesn’t want to break the streak.

Cyri Greengrass is the current leader of the neutral faction in the Wizengamot, and while not as large as the Light or the Dark, they are often the deciding votes in major legislation.

During the blood war, the neutrals went almost untouched. Their willingness to make deals with either side and ability to call Dumbledore on his bullshit meant that You-know-who and his cronies didn’t want to alienate potential allies.

So they watched in fear as the monster murdered dark families who wouldn’t bow. They watched as the occasional light family was wiped out for some slight or another. They listened to rumours of the murder of entire families belonging to muggleborn children.

The Greengrass family has outright refused betrothal contracts for generations. They allowed their children to find love for themselves, her muggleborn grandmother met Cyrus Greengrass working as a legal clerk assisting the Wizengamot.

Her father was a Lestrange who was disowned for _‘debasing himself’_ with a half-blood. Quincy Greengrass _né_ Lestrange was quite happy to be rid of them before the head of House Lestrange was thrown in Azkaban alongside his wife and brother.

The two were Hogwarts sweethearts, her mother a Slytherin, and her father a Ravenclaw. They first met as prefects and were dating by the end of their fifth year. They were sickeningly in love and had a penchant for grossing out their daughters with sloppy kisses.

So Daphne Greengrass, the ice queen of Slytherin, who could silence men twice her age with a look, was a hopeless romantic. She dreamed of grossing out her own children one day and reads sappy romance novels every night behind the curtains of her bed.

Being dragged by Tracey to the study group was the highlight of her first few years of Hogwarts. She could be herself with them, she was tired of hiding weaknesses from the snakes in her year. So she suffered through Parkinson’s snoring and Malfoy’s tirades against Potter. Nott’s belief that he was Merlin’s gift to women, and Bulstrode’s habit of beating up anyone who looked at her wrong. All while getting a few hours of freedom in the library every week.

When Hermione walked into the great hall on Viktor’s arm, it was a surprising way to realize she had a crush on her Gryffindor friend. She was so jealous, watching the Bulgarian dance with her. When they had their first study group meeting of the new year, and Hermione informed them they were only friends, she sighed in relief.

Unfortunately, Tracey noticed, and she spent the rest of the night getting grilled about her newfound crush.

The rest of the year was peaceful. They watched Fleur as failed the second task, while Cedric and Viktor nearly tied. The entire study group was outraged at Hermione being dragged into the tournament.

The final task began with Fleur going in last and ended with her coming out first. Trophy in hand, nearly glowing with pride on the victor’s stage. The underdog for almost the entire tournament and she won.

Pureblood circles whispered of creatures and cheating for weeks. How could a British pureblood lose to a half-blood foreigner, and _‘some creature’_. Daphne and her mother spent entire evenings holding in their laughter at the idiocy. Her father would simply give them fond shakes of his head.

So she spent the summer dragged to parties, and worrying over whether Hermione would ever like her back. Then, if she did, what to do about it. She wasn’t sure how much worse the snake pit would be if she was more than a passing acquaintance with a muggleborn, or worse, a Gryffindor.

The heiress returned to Hogwarts with vague plans of gauging the other girl’s interest.

* * *

Whatever happened to Hermione over the break was good for her.

If she wasn’t sure she had _’feelings’_ for the brunette, she was now. She was trying her hardest not to blush every time Hermione looked in her direction.

Tracey loved every minute of it. She’d burst into laughter when they got back to their dorm after study group.

So she stumbled through her first crush, not sure what to do about it. Occasionally catching what might be an interested look or shy smile.

Then Hermione abducted her…

Without warning…

In the great hall…

In front of the entire school…

She wasn’t even sure what was going on. All of a sudden Weasley was shouting, and Hermione was defending her. Standing up to one of her best friends. Then the entire hall erupted in chaos.

It was all a blur for her, Tracey had to drag her back to the common room and give her a play-by-play. She didn’t even manage to eat dinner. They had to sneak down to the kitchens a few hours later.

The next day was even more surprising, she had acknowledged it was a possibility. Yet, she was still surprised when the Gryffindor asked her to Hogsmeade.

The rest of the week was a jumble. Hermione and the Twins were mixing up the banners every day, changing what was on them, giving the tables each a name, changing the order. It all faded to the background though, she was looking forward to the weekend too much. You could tell it was working though, by how many new groups were walking around with kids from more than one house.

* * *

Before she knew it, she was waiting for Hermione in the entrance hall.

“Daphne!” Her date shouted as soon as she spotted her. The Gryffindor ran up to her and quickly went from obviously excited to not sure what to do with her hands.

The brunette settled for a small wave.

Daphne linked arms with the other girl, “Let’s find a carriage? I want to beat the crowds to Honeydukes, Tori throws a fit if I don’t get her anything.”

Her friend looked pensive for a moment, “I always wanted a sibling, there were complications after my birth. So my parents didn’t want to risk it.

“She’s annoying, but she's family." She said with a nod, then a thought occurred to her. "You ended up adopting a pair of little brothers all by yourself though."

“I guess, sometimes I feel more like Harry’s mum or babysitter. Ron makes a good annoying little brother though.” The brunette said with a small laugh.

They hopped in the carriage, and the conversation carried on.

“Have you talked to him yet?” She was never a fan of the youngest Weasley boy, but Hermione seemed to enjoy his friendship. Usually.

“He keeps giving Harry and me these sad puppy looks. He’ll probably apologize soon. He might not give the best apologies, but you know he means them.”

“I never understood how you can put up with him. From the outside, he looks like such a nuisance.”

“Primary school was rough for me, I was constantly bullied. Years of pent-up aggression and little Hermione was afraid to let it out. Then Ron said something stupid, and I snapped at him. He just laughed and went back to his game of chess. Without Ron, I think I would have murdered somebody by now. Plus, Harry can never stay mad at him. He was his first friend ever. Harry's childhood was pretty bad before Sirius took him in.”

“Ah yes, the wayward Lord Black. Mum introduced him to dad, says they’re thick as thieves. Fellow ‘family disappointments’.”

“I barely saw him this summer, I spent a couple of weeks at the Burrow before we left for Hogwarts. Harry dragged Sirius by a few times. Mostly he was just picking on Ginny and Harry.”

“Half of Slytherin knows those two are just a matter of time.” She said with a small shake of her head.

Hermione gave her a shrug, “Harry is still trying to get over some things, his relatives were problematic. Sirius is helping, but I’d be surprised if they got together before next summer.”

* * *

They took care of their shopping, and Hermione fought the urge to pick up a few new books while Daphne watched her warring emotions fondly. After that ordeal, they headed to Three Broomsticks.

“So tell me a secret?” Daphne asked after they got settled with their butterbeer.

“The hat wanted to put me in Slytherin. I asked for Ravenclaw, but it said I would make a terrible Ravenclaw. I may love knowledge, but it’ll never be for knowledge’s sake. I’m a planner and a do-er. The hat offers every muggleborn that would do well in Slytherin a choice. So between Gryffindor and Slytherin, I took the easy way out I guess.” She said with a shrug.

“Mum’s stories of Slytherin made me so excited for Hogwarts, when the hat didn’t offer me anything else I was so proud. I kind of regret it now. Too many people refusing to be sent to any other house, because ‘daddy would disown me if I went to Gryffindor’. Malfoy would have been a perfect Gryffindor. Crabbe and Goyle might come across as oafish bullies, but they are very kind to the younger snakes. They would have fit right in amongst the Hufflepuffs.”

“I always thought Draco and Harry would make surprisingly good friends. Now that Sirius is Lord Black, I’ve been trying to convince him to reach out to the Malfoys. Maybe get Narcissa to drag him away from the mansion. He just needs to stop running to his father every time he stubs his toe.” She shrugged and continued, “Would be one less bully for me.”

“Mum was friendly with Lady Malfoy before her bonding. Lord Malfoy was pretty controlling about her social circle, so they lost contact pretty soon after Hogwarts.”

“I wonder what would happen if Sirius annulled their bonding. Magic would probably judge him in the right if he tried, after what Voldemort did to Regulus.”

“Mum always wondered what happened to him.”

“He was going to run away to France, Narcissa was helping him, but her husband got wind of it. Ratted him out to Voldemort. So basically, Lucius’s actions led directly to the death of the Black heir.”

“Oh wow, yeah Sirius should do something about that.”

“He’s been worried about the exact wording of the contract, apparently it was a pretty Dark contract. After Andy refused to bond with Lucius and ran off with Ted, Abraxas Malfoy renegotiated a pretty strict contract.”

“Sirius tells you all these details about House Black?”

“He’s kind of grooming me to be Heir Black,” she said with a blush, “Harry is heir right now, but he doesn’t want anything to do with politics. Sirius wants to blood adopt me, I haven’t made up my mind yet. He’s impotent from Azkaban, so he’ll need to adopt if Harry doesn’t want anything to do with House Black. Andy was giving me lessons over the summer to see if I was interested in taking the next step.”

“Oh wow, how do your parents feel about that? I feel like muggle parents might be a little scared to let some stranger adopt their only daughter.”

The brunette sighed, “Sirius and Mum have… bonded… over torturing me. They love how frustrated I get because they won’t talk about the details of their ‘agreement’.”

“Ah yes, poor Hermione Granger, deprived of knowledge. I can see the pouting now.” She said with a laugh.

Hermione sighed, “Yeah well, Andy gives these fond looks every time I ask her, so it can’t be anything too bad.”

* * *

The first battle of the table war happened the Monday after their first date.

She had heard whispers from some of the older Slytherins, but nothing concrete.

When she came down for breakfast, Marcus Flint had almost the entire Slytherin house dressed and ready to go, “Come on! We're taking our table back!” He shouted.

The cheering crowd followed the Quidditch captain out of the common room.

Daphne lagged behind. They had left extra early, and it showed. The hall was almost empty, save her… Hermione… flanked by the Weasley twins, still one green and one red. All three were calmly sipping morning tea, in sync. Suddenly, Daphne was a little more worried and rushed as far away from the other Slytherins as possible.

“Morning Daphne!” Hermione said with a smile. As soon as the brunette spoke up, the twins stood, ran over, and pushed her into the seat next to her friend.

The twin on her right gave a rather gallant bow, “How would you like your morning tea, Lady Greengrass.” He said without looking up.

“Uhm… just a splash of milk.” She hedged.

She heard a snap behind her, and the red-headed twin was passing his green compatriot a cup of tea. He carefully placed it in front of her.

“Your tea, milady.” He said and took the seat next to her. The other twin was soon taking his seat on the other side of Hermione.

“What’s with all that?” The blonde asked.

“They want to start a store, I mentioned it to Sirius now he's super excited. He’s calling it his retirement once I take over House Black. I told them to make a business plan, and I’ll go over it with Sirius.”

“So nothing to do with what’s about to happen to my illustrious house?”

“Nope,” she said, popping the P, “this was all their idea. They had to convince me.”

“We’ve been waiting for this since the beginning.” The green twin said.

“Yeah, this is the culmination of all our efforts over the last week.” The red twin continued

Daphne watched as the couple non-Slytherins were carefully muscled away from the pink teddy-bear table. Regardless of how she felt about some of the more annoying members of their house, they knew how to threaten without actual threats.

“So how upset will Tracy be that I let her sleep in?”

The green twin wiggled his hand back and forth, “She’ll miss the big bang, but it’s going to last all day.”

When it came, it wasn’t much of a bang, more of a pop. Then pink smoke started consuming the Slytherins and their table.

It quickly cleared, and the entire table had pink hair. The green trim on their robes was pink, and in place of the Slytherin emblem was the pink bear from the banner above the table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next will be Hermione's PoV with the aftermath of the twins' prank.


End file.
